So this summer I took a two-month hiatus from Crossfit and yoga. I was working as a camp counselor and yes I was getting exercise, but not the kind of exercise I was getting before. I was at Crossfit 6 days a week and fitting in yoga where I could. That was not the best balance for me and it was not sustainable, but at the time, I was super into that schedule.
After those two months were up, I went back to Crossfit expecting to pick up where I left off.
I almost left my box in tears my first day back.
This was not because I hurt myself or my coaches yelled at me. I was that disappointed in myself and that pissed off that I wasn’t exactly where I wanted to be. I was saying things to myself like “just pick up the bar, what are you doing?” “you are such a failure, why did you let this happen?” “you’re not going to finish the workout anyways, why don’t you just quit now and save yourself the trouble?”
I have had these negative thoughts come into my mind frequently since starting again at Crossfit and yoga. I haven’t gotten back into a full swing of working out again due to some health issues I have been having for the past two months, but that is another story.
I just stopped the other day, when one of these horrid thoughts was entering my mind and said enough.
I told myself “I don’t deserve this negative talk.” I wouldn’t let anyone talk to me like that, so why was I allowing myself to talk to me like that? From there on out I promised to try to be more gentle towards myself and my progress.
That kind of critical and negative thinking doesn’t help anything.
I know I am not the only person who does this too. And I am telling you, please stop! You are just hurting yourself with those thoughts.
You are worth so much more.
Everyone deserves to be able to work out and on their fitness and health in a stress and judgment free environment. That is including your internal environment.
You can be your own worst enemy.
Here are some ways that I work on being gentle with myself that you can try out too.
I am still actively working on this, and I encourage you to make an effort towards it too. There will be more to come on this topic. I promise!
I hope you enjoy, and I will see you tomorrow to talk about inspiration.